Philosophy
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Stop being upset for no good reason. Perhaps “upset” is too strong a word. “Anxious” is better, but it’s a bit too indeterminate, as in the phrase “free-floating anxiety.” Maybe the best word is “alarmed,” which means being anxiously aware of danger, but in this case toned down to being aware of difficulty at a low, almost subconscious, level. This natural but unpleasant feeling manifests itself whenever we find ourselves in situations where experience or common sense tell us that difficulties could arise or that things might not turn out the way we would like. Such situations occur many times every day, but most people never discover that it’s possible, without too much effort, to break the emotional habit of being alarmed at this low, almost subconscious, level.

Here are two common situations to illustrate where the maxim applies. Anyone who drives doesn’t get upset every time they have to stop for a red light—unless, for instance, their passenger is a woman who has suddenly gone into labour. Normally we don’t get upset stopping for red lights because we know that they’re necessary for safety, and that they make traffic flow more efficient. But suppose we’re trying to get out of a side street to make a left turn onto a busy main road. Every time we’re clear on one side there’s traffic coming from the opposite direction, and vice versa. If this goes on for a few minutes and a line of cars forms behind us, it’s quite natural to start feeling upset. But while it is natural, we have no good reason for being upset. There is, after all, no cause for alarm. The worst that might happen is that the last driver in the line might bonk his horn out of impatience, or we might blame ourselves for being overly cautious and having missed opportunities. Such situations are just the price you pay for driving.

Many situations of a similar nature are the price you pay for living in this world. However, with persistence you can train your emotions so that you don’t get upset in all those situations where there’s no good reason to be upset. Initially you’ll have to watch yourself like a hawk. Also, it’s a good strategy to count how many times you automatically start feeling upset over nothing before you catch yourself and resolve not to be upset. According to Bertrand Russell zest is the most universal and distinctive mark of happy people. If few people seem full of zest, one of the main reasons has to be that every day they get upset for no good reason.

[Now combine the above with the following passage from C. S. Lewis (slightly paraphrased):]

The first lifelong friend I made at Oxford was A. K. Hamilton Jenkin, since known for his books on Cornwall. He continued (what Arthur had begun) my education as a seeing, listening, smelling, receptive creature. Arthur had had his preference for the Homely. But Jenkin seemed to be able to enjoy everything; even ugliness. I learned from him that we should attempt a total surrender to whatever atmosphere was offering itself at the moment; in a squalid town to seek out those very places where its squalor rose almost to grandeur, on a dismal day to find the most dismal and dripping wood, on a windy day to climb the windiest ridge. There was nothing ironic about it; only a serious, yet gleeful, determination to rub one’s nose in the very essence of each thing, to rejoice in its being (so defiantly) what it was.

[And for those prepared to consider things from a religious viewpoint, we have this:]

Can any one of you, for all his anxiety, add a cubit’s growth to his height? And why should you be anxious over clothing? [Then He talks about the lilies of the field and how they outdo Solomon in all his glory.] Do not fret, then, asking, What are we to eat? or What are we to drink? or How shall we find clothing? It is for the heathen to busy themselves over such things; you have a Father in heaven who knows that you need them all. Make it your first care to find the kingdom of God, and his approval, and all these things shall be yours without the asking. Do not fret, then, over tomorrow; leave to-morrow to fret over its own needs; for to-day, to-day’s troubles are enough.

Matt 6:27-34

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